Pregnancy Over 40, Parenting Over 40
The first three months of my daughter’s life, I was totally insulated from “the competition” (i.e. other mothers). I had wonderful days alone with her where I nursed her and spent a good part of the day cuddling. It doesn’t get much better than this, I thought.Getting Pregnant Over 40, Most Other Mothers Are Younger
My first experience with other mothers, which, by the way, are young enough to be my daughter was interesting. When I started bringing my baby to the library story times when she was 4 months I immediately felt like I was being “grilled”. How much does your baby weigh? Are you nursing? Does she roll over? Do you let her watch TV? Does she eat food yet?Once I answered the above questions (wondering if I was giving the “right” answers), I was bombarded with what their baby could do. I listened politely, but was always thinking in the back of my mind, “Why are they telling me all this? Do they think I’m a pediatrician or something?” Does it really matter whether or not their baby can eat strained sweet potatoes or green beans or whether or not their baby can lift their head? What’s going on here?
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SEE ALSO: PREGNANCY OVER 40 AND AVOIDING NEGATIVE INFORMATION (getpregnantover40.com)
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I finally realized that it’s the mother’s insecurity at work. They were feeling like their baby might not be doing everything they should, so they ask other people what their baby is doing. When the other person’s baby isn’t doing as much as theirs - bingo – my kid’s better than yours! Maybe I’m an OK mother afterall!
My advice? Take it all in stride. Try to surround yourself with other mothers who don't get caught up in the "competition". I like to get together with other "mature" moms who have more than one child. They have a better perspective on how each child is unique with their own strengths and weaknesses. In the end most kids grow up being able to do most things with a reasonable level of proficiency. So if your baby is the last one to eat their sweet potatoes, never fear - they may just be a "green bean" person!
